Stuck Archives - Laurie Hopkins

August 19 2019

I’m Stuck, You’re Stuck, We’re All Stuck – Why We Feel There is More Than This and What We Can Do About It

A few weeks ago we talked about murmuring and its ability to keep us stuck making paths around the same old mountains, learning the same old lessons. Some of us read that and thought, “oh, that’s interesting, but it doesn’t really apply to me.” But if we were to be really honest with ourselves and with those around us, we would say, “I’m Stuck, You’re Stuck, We’re All Stuck! This week I would love for us to chat about “why we feel there is more than this and what we can do about it!

Checking In

How are you doing? Really, how are you doing? Not the pat answer, “oh, I’m OK.” But the real, open up and tell me your thoughts, answer. I would love to hear from you and how you are doing with the life issues we are chatting about. Drop a note below or connect with me by email by clicking here. The last few weeks have been a real eye-opener for me. I love when I sit down and share with others because I always find it is for me first! Are you a murmurer? I am. There is no shame in that. At least I’m aware of it and because I am aware of it, I can begin to make a shift. Hang in there, change takes time. Don’t get discouraged, tomorrow is always a new day!

Stuck Defined

Merriam Webster has a Kids Dictionary (let’s keep it straightforward). So I plugged in the word “stuck” and this is what I got:

to put in a specified place or position
to remain in a place, situation, or environment
to halt the movement or action of
BAFFLE
to burden with something unpleasant
to cling or cause to cling
to become blocked or jammed

Merriam Webster (2019). Retrieved from: https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/stick#kidsdictionary

Well, I don’t know about you, but when I talk about feeling stuck, this is exactly how I feel; placed, remaining, halted, baffled, burdened, clingy and blocked. What other words or phrases would you use to describe the feeling of being stuck?

How Can You Feel Stuck When You Are Moving?

But, you say, I get up every day and take care of the day to day things, get to work, make supper, sometimes even meet with my friends for tea. Am I really stuck if I’m still moving? The question is not so much about how much you are moving; we have a tremendous ability to push through and keep moving in spite of how we feel and the circumstances we find ourselves in. Rather, the question is more about how are we feel about moving. My experience of feeling stuck is not so much about how much I am or am not moving, but rather about the thoughts that come; “there has to be more than this.” Or even more so, the thought “I am more than this.”

There Has To Be More Than This – (I’m Tired Of Running In Place)

There is an old saying about worry being like a rocking chair, lots of motion but not getting anywhere. Being stuck is similar to sitting in a rocking chair. We feel like we are moving and moving fast, but at the end of the day when we evaluate our progress, we see that we haven’t made much if any, headway. I don’t know about you, but I’m weary of this feeling of running in place. There has to be more than this!

I Am More Than This (Stuck Is A Mindset)

Further to this last thought, being stuck for long periods of time begins to do a job on our self-esteem. We begin to feel unable and unproductive and over time, we move from not just feeling there has to be more than this, but it becomes personal; I am more than this! Stuck is a mindset and mindsets are personal. They impact the very way we see ourselves, which over time impacts the way others see us and respond to us as well.

What Keeps Us Stuck? (Thought Life and In-Authenticity)

So why are we so stuck? Why this feeling of “there is” , “I am” more? Let’s look at 4 things that keep us stuck:

1) Our thought life – as we think, so we are (Proverbs 23:7). We often don’t realize the importance or necessity of keeping a tight rein on our thought life; so we allow it to wander where it will. But our thought life determines our direction. If we are entertaining negative, destructive, or self-defeating thoughts in our mind, that will result in like-minded actions in our life; the self-fulfilling prophecy.

2) In-authenticity – cognitive dissonance happens when we act in a way that is contrary to what we believe. How many of us spend a large portion of our time creating a beautiful and complicated facade to present to the world around us; carefully protected the real bits and pieces of who we are from the judgment of ourselves and others? We can’t move forward because we are using up our time and energy creating that which runs opposite to what we truly are. We find ourselves stuck in the dance of “how do you like me now?”

What Keeps Us Stuck? (Fear And Unintentional Living)

3) Fear – fear of failure, fear of success, fear of the unknown, fear of what others will think. So many fears that can keep us paralyzed on all fronts. Fear causes a lack of forward movement. And stuck happens!

4) Not living intentionally – unintentional living brings us back to that rocking chair. We are busy, moving quickly, but because we don’t know where we are heading, we never feel like we are arriving. If you don’t know where you want to go, how will you ever know when you get there?

So What’s The Antidote To Stuck? (As Individuals)

1) Get control of those thoughts – “be transformed by the renewing of your mind” NKJV Search Results for “renewing” AND “of” AND “your” AND “mind”. Retrieved from https://www.blueletterbible.org//search/search.cfm?Criteria=renewing+of+your+mind&t=NKJV#s=s_primary_0_1

2) Be the real you – “I will praise You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made; marvelous are Your works, and that my soul knows very well.” NKJV Search Results for “fearfully” AND “and” AND “wonderfully” AND “made”. Retrieved from https://www.blueletterbible.org//search/search.cfm?Criteria=fearfully+and+wonderfully+made&t=NKJV#s=s_primary_0_1

3) Do it afraid – “Do not fear, little flock, for it is your Father’s good pleasure to give you the kingdom.” NKJV Search Results for “do” AND “not” AND “fear”. Retrieved from https://www.blueletterbible.org//search/search.cfm?Criteria=do+not+fear&t=NKJV#s=s_primary_0_1

“I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.” NKJV Search Results for “i” AND “can” AND “do” AND “all” AND “things”. Retrieved from https://www.blueletterbible.org//search/search.cfm?Criteria=i+can+do+all+things&t=NKJV#s=s_primary_0_1

4) Make a plan –“ The steps of a good man are ordered by the LORD” NKJV Search Results for “the” AND “steps” AND “of” AND “a” AND “good” AND “man” AND “are” AND “ordered”. Retrieved from https://www.blueletterbible.org//search/search.cfm?Criteria=the+steps+of+a+good+man+are+ordered&t=NKJV#s=s_primary_0_1

So What’s The Antidote To Stuck? (As Community)

1) Encourage someone else – know that if you are feeling stuck, others around you are feeling stuck. Actively reach out and check on those around you. Find out where they are, where they want to go and how you can be an encouragement to them on that journey.

2) Let others be the real them – you will begin to find freedom in being the real you when you begin to let others be their real selves. Expectations breed expectations. The search for real can begin with you.

3) Find your tribe – there is a group out there for all of us; a small or large group of people with whom we identify and with whom we feel able to be genuinely us. Go out and find your tribe.

4) Share your stories – unity and community will be built as we discover who we really are, live who we really are, and are honest with ourselves and others about our stories. Sharing creates connection. Connections lead to encouragement. Encouragement encourages forward momentum.

What I Know

I know that we are not alone in our feelings of being stuck. Somehow, I know that I’m stuck, you’re stuck, we’re all stuck! I also know that we feel like there is more than this because there is more than this.

We need to start by admitting where we are and then move on to consciously deciding where we want to be. In between we need to live real and build unity and community by sharing our stories and encouraging one another.

In doing this we will be able to trade in the rocking chair for something that will not just occupy our time and keep us moving, but will actually begin to take us somewhere!

Until Next Time

Well, it is that time again. The bit of tea that is left in my cup has grown cold. I so cherish our time together and I hope that you do as well.

I would love to hear from you. Are you feeling stuck? What would you like to do about it? How can I, or others around you, encourage you to trade that rocking chair for something that will allow for forward momentum? Drop me some notes below in the comments section!

If you are getting something out of our conversations and know others who would like to join us, share the blog using the email, Facebook or Pinterest buttons directly below the blog! The more the merrier!

If you are interested in more Devotional reading, head over to my Facebook Page where you will find a Weekly Devotion early every Monday morning. Click here to go directly to my Facebook Page.

Until next time,

From my heart to yours!

Laurie

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July 8 2019

Why Do You Need To Make One More Trip Around This Mountain? Murmuring and How it will Keep You Stuck

Good Morning, Good Morning! It is that time again! Grab a cup of something fabulous, set aside a few minutes so we can sit together and chat and let’s go! This week I spent a far bit of my devotional time reading through the books of Exodus and Numbers. I’m fascinated with the story of the Children of Israel and their journey from Egypt, through the desert, to the Promised Land. This week I was particularly struck by their murmuring. What I would love to share with you this week starts with a question? Why do you need to make one more trip around this mountain? Murmuring and how it will keep you stuck.

Checking In

Before we get started I always like to check in! How was your week? How did you do with anchoring your moments and being more intentional about your time? It is a process, so don’t get discouraged if it didn’t work out so well this week, stick with it and it will come in time!

There is a Rumble

Murmuring; there is something about the word itself that has a feeling of disruption or unsettledness. Merriam Webster defines a murmur as a low indistinct but often continuous sound (retrieved from: https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/murmur). Murmuring happens when we don’t have or choose not to use our courage to muster up our assertive voice to bring forth our complaints; instead we lower our voice, turn our head slightly towards one who will listen and begin to voice our opinions. Murmuring has the feeling of a low continuous rumble. Not enough to make a change, but just enough to unsettle the masses.

How it all Started

In the book of Exodus we read about the Children of Israel who were being oppressed in the land of Egypt. God sent Moses in to set them free from their oppression and to lead them into the Promised Land; a land He had prepared for them. In the process of setting them free, the Children of Israel witnessed many miracles through the hand of Moses. Obviously their faith grew through the process, because when it came time for them to leave Egypt, they packed up their belongings and followed Moses out into the desert.

They Developed Their Faith at the Red Sea

The Lord led them out of Egypt with a pillar of fire by night and a cloud by day. He led them out into the wilderness by the way of the Red Sea. God was intentional about where He was leading them. Their faith was about to be strengthened! The time had come to see the Hand of the Lord move in a mighty and miraculous way. The Egyptians realized their mistake in letting the Children of Israel go and followed hard after them. When the Children of Israel looked up they saw the Red Sea in front of them and the army of Pharaoh behind them. They raised up their voices and cried out to the Lord.

Do Not Be Afraid

Moses said: “Do not be afraid. Stand still, and see the salvation of the LORD, which He will accomplish for you today. For the Egyptians whom you see today, you shall see again no more forever. “The LORD will fight for you, and you shall hold your peace.” (Exodus 14:13-14 (NKJV) – Now the LORD spoke to. Retrieved from https://www.blueletterbible.org/nkjv/exo/14/1/s_64001).

Faith rose up in the Children of Israel! When Moses stretched out his hand, the sea divided before them and the Children of Israel moved forward in great faith and crossed over!

And Then Came the Murmuring

The Children of Israel were given a mighty victory over the Egyptians. They were now on their way to the Promised Land! Given the cloud that went before them by day and the pillar of fire by night and this great victory granted them at the Hand of the Lord, we could assume that the story of the Children of Israel and the remainder of their journey into the Promised Land would be one of faith and continued victory. But the Children of Israel became stuck. They are well known in the Scriptures for their constant murmuring. That murmuring and lack of ability to activate their faith and learn the lessons needed, kept them stuck in the desert 40 years. How many times did they round the same mountains again and again wondering when they would finally see the Promised Land?

What was all the Murmuring About?

As we read further we can see that every time the Children of Israel faced a challenge, the murmuring started. There are many instances, but in looking more closely, they seem to be grouped into three main categories.

1) When they choose not to activate their faith

2) When they didn’t distinguish between their needs and their wants.

3) When they were trying to run someone else’s race

Activate your Faith

1) Three days into the wilderness, after the mighty miracle at the Red Sea, they came to Marah where they found water but discovered it too bitter to drink. It was time to activate their faith! If the God that went before them could part the Red Sea so they could cross, surely He could provide water to drink. They had the measure of faith they required – they had activated it at the Rea Sea when they stepped onto the dry land between the separated waters. But the Scripture tells us that they “complained against Moses.”

Perhaps they were tired of traveling, worn down by the desert heat or distracted by the uncertainty of their future. However, this was the time they needed to activate the measure of faith placed down inside of them. Instead of doing so, they choose to murmur. God still provided the water, but their faith missed an opportunity to be activated and the lesson wasn’t learned. Several times they choose not to step up and activate the faith that was within them. Each time I believe their faith was weakened.

Finally as they Lord prepared them to enter the Promised Land, when their spies were sent in to survey the land, their faith was so depleted that 8 came back with a negative report with only 2 of them encouraging the people to go forth into what God had for them; what was already theirs! As a result of this unwillingness to activate their faith, they Lord caused them to wander 40 years in the desert until that whole generation had died. Because of their murmuring and their depleted faith, they never appropriated the very promise God took them out of Egypt to obtain.

Needs vs. Wants

2) The Children of Israel were many and as we can imagine it would have required a lot of food to keep them fed. When they murmured about the lack of food, God provided Manna, bread from heaven, that fell fresh like a heavy dew on the land each morning. It was to be gathered each day, not to be saved or stored. What was provided daily was sufficient to meet all their dietary needs.

And yet, after a time, they tired of the daily bread from heaven; the daily bread that was meeting all their needs. In Numbers we read that the murmuring started once again. They wanted meat. Again, God met their need; He brought flocks of quail into the camp for the Children of Israel. But as they feasted on their meat, they failed to understand that once again they had not learned the lesson. They hadn’t recognized the difference between their needs and their wants. Their needs were being met. Their needs and wants would both have been met in the Promised Land had they stopped their murmuring and waiting on the plan the Lord had for them.

Stay in your own Lane

3) The other moment of murmuring that stood out for me was when the people rose up against Moses and Aaron and their leadership. In Numbers 16:3 we read: “They gathered together against Moses and Aaron, and said to them, You take too much upon yourselves, for all the congregation is holy, every one of them, and the LORD is among them. Why then do you exalt yourselves above the assembly of the LORD?” (Numbers 16:1 (NKJV) – Now Korah the son of. Retrieved from https://www.blueletterbible.org/nkjv/num/16/1/s_133001).

The people were headed towards the Promised Land. The cloud went before them by day and the pillar of fire by night. Throughout this journey God spoke to Moses, the leader He had chosen. Moses intervened on their behalf many times with the Lord. And yet, these people felt that they should be leaders as well. Instead of focusing on their own day to day responsibilities, activating their own faith and gaining entrance to the Promised Land, they began focusing on what Moses and Aaron were doing. And the murmuring ensured.

The murmuring about Moses and Aaron was just a continuation of the murmuring that had taken place all along. At this point they had chosen not to enter the Promised Land as the Lord had intended. In all the instances of murmuring they had depleted their faith and because of that they found themselves stuck in the desert.

What About Us?

It is wonderful to talk about the Children of Israel and their murmuring and what they should have done differently. But I wonder how many times we ourselves get caught up in the same patterns? How often has God asked us to step up and activate our faith and we have found ourselves murmuring instead? When was the last time we murmured about not getting what we wanted, rather than being grateful that our needs were being met while God prepared us for a time and place where we wouldn’t have to worry about either? How easy is it to become focused on the race others are running rather than ensuring we are running our own race well? And the murmuring ensues.

We are not unlike the Children of Israel. God has performed mighty miracles in our lives and had granted us a measure of faith to be activated. We often choose not to activate that faith, get caught up in our wants vs our needs and don’t keep our eyes on the prize. Murmuring, intentionally or unintentionally becomes a way of life. Murmuring is contagious. The masses get unsettled. And we all find ourselves stuck in the desert wondering why we are taking turn after turn around the same ole mountain again and again.

The Cure for Murmuring-Rejoice!

Rejoice in the Lord always. Again I will say, rejoice!

Let your gentleness be known to all men. The Lord is at hand.

Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God;

and the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:4-7

(Philippians 4:4 (NKJV) – Rejoice in the Lord always. Retrieved from https://www.blueletterbible.org/nkjv/phl/4/4/s_1107004)

When you acknowledge your tendency to murmur, choose to turn aside from murmuring and began to actively replace it with gratitude and rejoicing, you will find that lessons are learned more quickly, faith is more easily activated and one or two turns around that mountain will be sufficient before moving onto the Promised Land. You will not be stuck any longer!

Until Next Time

This week, begin to recognize the rumble of murmuring in your life! Make the decision not to stay stuck, wandering around the same mountain and in the desert because of murmuring.

Well, it is that time again! My cup is empty and our time has come to a close. I’m so happy you stopped by!

If you are interested in more Devotional reading, head over to my Facebook Page where you will find a Weekly Devotion early every Monday morning. Click here to go directly to Weekly Devotions with Laurie.

Until next time,

From my heart to yours!

Laurie

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