The Struggle For Authenticity
Welcome back my friend! How has your week been? Did you have an opportunity to download and use the Attitude of Gratitude Mind Map from last week? If not, get it today! Would love to hear from you – how is life going, what is working, what is not working, what conversations do you want to have here in this space? This week, in this time we have together, I want to talk about what we are actually hiding from in our struggle to live our authentic life.
Not Hidden
The Lord knew us before the foundation of time (Ephesians 1:4). Nothing about us is hidden from His sight or His knowledge (Psalm 139). We have been created with a plan and a purpose and the very desires of our heart were placed within us by the Father (Psalm 37). We are intimately and expressly known. There is nothing about us that we can gloss over or hide with the Lord.
So, if we are clear that we can’t actually hide from the Lord, when we are struggling to live our authentic life, what or who are we are actually hiding from? What is your experience with this question?
Mirrored Judgments
We sometimes believe we are hiding from those around us. We struggle to live our authentic life primarily out of fear of the judgement of others. I would argue, however, that this is surface concern. The fear of the judgement of others in our lives, when drilled down to its core is that the judgement of others mirrors the very judgments we ourselves carry deep within us. These judgments are not new or unfamiliar and hold very little power over us as they are the very judgments that reside within us.
If we are clear that the judgments of those around us hold no power over us as they are not any different from what we carry within ourselves, when we are struggling to live our authentic life, what or who are we are actually hiding from? What is your experience with this question?
Hiding From Ourselves
It has been my experience that sometimes when I think I am hiding from the Lord, or those around me, I am actually hiding from myself. My inability to stay authentic has a tendency to come from a place of not being willing to admit, to myself, where I am. That unwillingness to acknowledge my current position is often related to my discomfort at looking directly at the distance between where I am and where I know I need/want to be.
Comfort
We are creatures of comfort and habit. We like to wear that comfy sweater, the one that fits just right, long after the cuffs are beyond well worn. Those shoes, the ones that mold perfectly to our feet; we do everything in our power to continue to wear them long past their natural expiry date. Comfort is what it is all about. For most of us habits are comfortable. The things we do naturally and with ease, often without even thinking about it, are the things we gravitate toward. They fit like that comfy sweater and they mold to our lives like those perfect shoes.
However, in order for me to step out into authenticity, really step out, I have to be willing to look at those places of comfort and acknowledge not only their presence but also their power in my life.
Discomfort
In doing this, it is a real possibility that discomfort will result; with stepping outside my comfort zone, even if only in my thoughts. Discomfort with the realization that there is a space between where I find myself and where I believe or even know I need to be. That discomfort which comes as I begin to make decisions; a decision to stay in my comfort zone and deny the destiny ahead of me or a decision to move out of that comfort zone into the unknown.
Priorities
I have to get to a place in my life where comfort is not my ultimate priority, acknowledging and accepting that discomfort will come regardless of whether I choose to grow or choose to become stagnant. When I begin to acknowledge and accept discomfort as a normal and expected piece of the puzzle of growth, I will find myself more willing to stop hiding from myself. When I no longer feel the need to hide from myself, there will be no struggle to live my authentic life. I will actively and easily make the daily decision to walk in authenticity.
Honesty = Authenticity= No Struggle To Live Our Authentic Life
If we can get to this place of being totally honest in this relationship with ourselves, authenticity in the other relationships in our lives will flow naturally.
How Do We Get There?
So how do we get to this place? This place of freedom and courage to look directly at ourselves, knowing that there will be discomfort and a need for decision making?
Where We Are vs Where We Are Going
Maybe it would help if we understood how the Lord sees us. He knows where we are but He sees us the way He has created us to be. The Lord, right from the beginning had a vision of who we were created to be. Ephesians 2:10 tells us that “we are His workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand that we should walk in them.” Like any great artist, the Lord had a clear plan and purpose for us and a vision of us in His mind. As He continues to mold and shape us, although He is aware of the stage we are currently in, His focus is always ahead at the finished product. The Lord sees us, whole and complete in Him, walking out the entirety of our purpose and destiny.
How We See Ourselves
When we look at ourselves, we often focus on the stage we find ourselves in. We are neither completed nor perfected; we are rough around the edges and without our final coat of paint. We are often harsh on ourselves, not granting ourselves grace as a work in progress but rather expecting perfection where perfection can’t yet exist. This judgement leads to the fear that God will be unhappy with us where we are and that others around us will hold up a mirror that reveals the very judgments we struggle with, within ourselves.
How We Need to See Ourselves
If we could only learn to see ourselves as God sees us. A piece of art, in progress, neither completed nor perfected; rough around the edges and without our final coat of paint; but still beautiful and closer today to where we are going than we were yesterday. If only we could receive the love of God that is aware of where we are but sees us where we are going; that reckless and inexplicable love the Creator has for His unique creation.
Walking in that love, we would be more than eager to look directly at ourselves, assess our progress, and make the necessary adjustments, all the while looking eagerly ahead as what is yet to come. Authenticity would flow naturally in our lives and we would be more than pleased to encourage that same authenticity in the lives of those around us.
Where Are You?
What is your experience with the struggle to live authentically? Are you hiding from God? Perhaps the judgement of those around you feels powerful in your life because you don’t yet understand that those judgments only mirror your own. Maybe you fear looking directly at who/where you are because comfort is still a priority in your life and habits still have the power to keep you stagnant. Who are you really hiding from in your struggle to live authentically?
What I Know!
We are all walking a similar journey. If we could find grace for ourselves, we would find grace for those around us. You may encounter discomfort but you can get to a point where your desire for growth outweighs your need for the comfort of staying the same.
Take a Look!
I dare you to take a look! Where are you today and where are you going? What is your next step? The journey is full of valleys and mountains, a few meadows and some streams with only stepping stones, but I know you can do it!
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Until next time,
From my heart to yours!
laurie
